Wednesday, August 28, 2013

I shouldn't have done that

So I finally broke down yesterday and got onto the scale. I really shouldn't have done that. I have gained two pounds back. I know that doesn't sound like anything to freak out over but I'm back up to 180 pounds and it took me like three months to take those two pounds off in the first place. That did not make my day at all.

I did some online research into what the side effects to having an ovarian cyst are and I wasn't surprised by the answers. Most of the symptoms I've had at one time or another with some of them being an everyday thing. I was relieved to see that weight gain and expanding girth around the midsection were quite common for woman suffering from this condition. So all this extra weight and bloat (caused from inflammation) that I am carrying around is because of "Ted" (my mass). I am seriously hoping that once this mass is removed and my hormones and system even back out I'll be able to start losing weight and being able to get healthy again without any further delays. Two weeks and two days until surgery day and I'm counting down and wishing it would just get here so it could be done with.

I have been really down and out about this extra weight on my belly lately. I seriously look pregnant. I know I haven't eaten gluten or dairy recently so I have no allergens to blame this time. It's frustrating that a mass that is only 4.3 centimeters in diameter and probably only weighs a few grams can be causing this many crazy side effects. The funny thing is I can still fit into my size 14 pair of jeans and they are a little snug, so once I drop the inflammation weight I'm probably going to need to go buy new jeans in a size 12 possibly. My size 16's are all way to large for me and I constantly feel like my pants are falling down. I guess that's not a bad thing at all.

Moving onto better news, I have a job interview on Thursday. With all the upcoming medical expenses and my son being in band for the first time this year, we are going to need every bit of extra income I can make. I applied at the local Kroger grocery store to work in the Starbucks inside the store. I have worked at a coffee shop before so this will be nothing new to me. I can no longer consume the drinks at Starbucks, so I won't be sabotaging my diet with those added calories daily. I'm hoping for part time work, but if all they have to offer me is something full time well then I'll take it and make it work. I usually have a hard time finding a balance between working a full time job and managing to get things done at home daily but this is something that needs to happen if I want to keep us out of debt and make sure that my son is able to be in band. I remember how expensive band is and I know now as a parent that it is an investment and I'm more than willing to make whatever sacrifices that I need to make in order for him to be part of something that will change his life and celebrate his love for music.

So basically on this hump day I am feeling fat and wishing we had more money. Gee, I sound like I'm whining again don't I? Everything will work out in due time, I just have to be patient. (Not something that I'm very good at).

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