Why does my life have to be such a mental mind fuck? I mean seriously. Why can I not simply find people or things that I enjoy and just dammit enjoy them? But no, that's not how my world works. Instead I second guess every action, I hate myself daily for something from my past, I tear myself up over how I make other people feel and I wish that I could just go back in time and do everything different. Today is not a good mental day at all. I have been sick to my stomach and brewing a headache all afternoon and I personally think that my existence is the cause of a number of problems for certain people in my life right now. Welcome to the negative side of me if you don't like it or are offended by my self loathing, STOP FUCKING READING MY BLOG!
I didn't make coffee this morning maybe that's why my day went to hell. Fuck coffee at this point I need vodka and lots of it. When you can't swim anymore drown in the bliss that is ignorance. Nuff said.